Family Relations- Journal
Family 160
Hello! My name is Tahshena Woods. I have made this blog and started this journal for my family relations class up her at BYU-Idaho. I love my family and I have come to love my brand new family, my husband, Coulton Woods. We were married on June 3, 2011, only over 3 months ago! I am so excited to be in the Home and Family department; family is my passion. Because of that passion, I am excited to be in this class and to learn more about the family. So here I start a journal for the class, full of insights and and new things learned from my upcoming family class!
The Challenge to Become
Sunday, September 18, 2011
In reading The Challenge to Become, I realized that it's not just what we do here in our lives that will determine our destiny, but who we have actually become. Going to church, the temple, reading our scriptures, praying and serving do not make up a checklist of things to do. These things help us become someone, someone who is more like our Savior, if we do it for the purpose of really changing, not because our Relief Society President told us to. Many people in the world believe that our judgement will rest upon the things that we did in this life. However, Elder Oaks stated that it's so much more than that. We will be judged on the kind of person we have BECOME.
You have how many children?!
Thursday, September 22, 2011
I love how we discussed in class the decline of the number of children born in today's families. Many people are deciding on having very few children or sometimes even deciding to have none. That thought made me sad. So many able women are denying themselves of so many blessings. Even families within the church are having fewer and fewer children. Brother Williams made a very point in class on Wednesday- "How can we stand before God and tell him that we are prepared and qualified to have our own world and millions of children if we didn't even want 4 or 5 children here on earth?" He made a very valid point. The Spirit and desires that we have here on this earth will be carried on into the post-mortal world where we will have the same Spirit and desires.
The Most Important Subsets
Thursday, September 29, 2001
We talked about subsets, systems within a larger system. We talked about the most important system, the family. We also mentioned the most important subset within the family, the parental subset. Mom & Dad...they effect every other subset within the family, whether it be a relationship with a child or the relationship within the siblings. It has been said before that the best way for a father to love his children is to love their mother, and I can testify to this. The parents are the most important subset in the family and they can make all the differnce.
We talked about subsets, systems within a larger system. We talked about the most important system, the family. We also mentioned the most important subset within the family, the parental subset. Mom & Dad...they effect every other subset within the family, whether it be a relationship with a child or the relationship within the siblings. It has been said before that the best way for a father to love his children is to love their mother, and I can testify to this. The parents are the most important subset in the family and they can make all the differnce.
My Family Culture
My family consists of a dad, a mom and children. We grew up in a big city, with neighbors on both sides of us with fences and gates seperating us. We went to school with thousands of students and with a shopping mall around the corner. We moved once, within the same city. Both of my parents are activie members of the church and we grew up in the church. We went to church every Sunday. We lived far away from any of our extened family, which I think made a difference in our family. My mother is not really close to any of her side of the family, which effects how often we see them. My brother and I are already married, and one sister is now in college. Two of my sisters are still in school, living at home. I think us moving on and leaving my parents empty nesters effects the family culture.
Important gender Roles
Thursday, October 13, 2011
As we have been discussing gender roles in class, I have been thinking a lot about what the proclamation to the family states about gender roles, "By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children." Along with this statement, it says that mothers and fathers are to work equally to serve the family. The world has many ideas of "gender roles," some might even think that there are no specific rules for gender. Regardless, the prophet has stated that each gender does hold specific roles and each is sacred to the Lord.
As we have been discussing gender roles in class, I have been thinking a lot about what the proclamation to the family states about gender roles, "By divine design, fathers are to preside over their families in love and righteousness and are responsible to provide the necessities of life and protection for their families. Mothers are primarily responsible for the nurture of their children." Along with this statement, it says that mothers and fathers are to work equally to serve the family. The world has many ideas of "gender roles," some might even think that there are no specific rules for gender. Regardless, the prophet has stated that each gender does hold specific roles and each is sacred to the Lord.
Living or Loving?
Friday, October 21, 2011
In class today, we discussed cohabitation. I realized that there is no positives to living together before marriage. I am so sad to see that my cousin has moved in with her brother. She is not happy, she has nothing good to say. I can see that what she is doing to only make her sad and cause her to be unprepared for marriage. I find it interesting that the church strongly disagrees with living together because the prophets and apostles know the effects of it. Now research shown is parallel to what the church states is correct because of the negative effects. May we all get married so that true happiness can happen!
In class today, we discussed cohabitation. I realized that there is no positives to living together before marriage. I am so sad to see that my cousin has moved in with her brother. She is not happy, she has nothing good to say. I can see that what she is doing to only make her sad and cause her to be unprepared for marriage. I find it interesting that the church strongly disagrees with living together because the prophets and apostles know the effects of it. Now research shown is parallel to what the church states is correct because of the negative effects. May we all get married so that true happiness can happen!
Whole Armor of God
October 31, 2011
In class, we talked about how Satan is doing everything he can to destroy the family. We discussed ways that we can defeat him. Fatherhood is the most important Priesthood calling and if we fulfill that calling, Satan will have less power. When we have grace in the family, there will be greater love. Grace is giving someone more than he deserves. When we have a game plan against Satan and put on the whole armor of God, we will defeat him. I know that this is true. Satan will do everything to destroy us, but we can crush his head.
In class, we talked about how Satan is doing everything he can to destroy the family. We discussed ways that we can defeat him. Fatherhood is the most important Priesthood calling and if we fulfill that calling, Satan will have less power. When we have grace in the family, there will be greater love. Grace is giving someone more than he deserves. When we have a game plan against Satan and put on the whole armor of God, we will defeat him. I know that this is true. Satan will do everything to destroy us, but we can crush his head.
Parents' Enormous Influence
In the article, "Making a Love Connection," I love how the authors stated that parents have an enormous influence. Parents are to be the first teachers of many things, especially relationships and intimacy. If we as parents, are the first to teach, someone else will be the one to teach our children. The article stated that parents are to communicate values, be included in our children's education, have resources on how to communicate with your children, and find easy to read research so that you can teach your children. I know that know that parents do have a great influence on almost every aspect of their children's lives. If we neglect that responsibility, our children will look for other ways to meet their needs.
My Own Family Crisis
November 10, 2011
As we spoke about family crises in class, a specific family crisis that my family and I experienced kept coming to my mind and I have decided to write about it. My brother had been serving his mission for about 7-8 months when my dad got a call from our Stake President telling us that he was having to come home early for some past mistakes that were "not taken care of." We were so sad. We were sad for him. We were sad that he no longer was able to serve. We were sad that he was going to have to go through something like this. My parents were really hurt- in all our minds, our brother and son was perfect. He had never done anything wrong, but we were wrong. He had made a mistake, just like we all do. My mother had a really hard time, saying that "her son could never do something like this." At first, we had a really hard time excepting him and making him feel welcome. We were sad and disappointed, especially my parents. But, after a couple of days of him being home, we all came to realize that we all make mistakes and that it is through Christ that we can make clean those mistakes. We were glad that he told the truth and decided to come and make things better. It was a long road, especially for him, but he made things right again and made the choice to continue to serve and fulfill his mission. As a family, we all became closer together and learned how to truly help, serve and love each other. My brother has been a great example to all of us.
As we spoke about family crises in class, a specific family crisis that my family and I experienced kept coming to my mind and I have decided to write about it. My brother had been serving his mission for about 7-8 months when my dad got a call from our Stake President telling us that he was having to come home early for some past mistakes that were "not taken care of." We were so sad. We were sad for him. We were sad that he no longer was able to serve. We were sad that he was going to have to go through something like this. My parents were really hurt- in all our minds, our brother and son was perfect. He had never done anything wrong, but we were wrong. He had made a mistake, just like we all do. My mother had a really hard time, saying that "her son could never do something like this." At first, we had a really hard time excepting him and making him feel welcome. We were sad and disappointed, especially my parents. But, after a couple of days of him being home, we all came to realize that we all make mistakes and that it is through Christ that we can make clean those mistakes. We were glad that he told the truth and decided to come and make things better. It was a long road, especially for him, but he made things right again and made the choice to continue to serve and fulfill his mission. As a family, we all became closer together and learned how to truly help, serve and love each other. My brother has been a great example to all of us.
Counseling in our Families
November 17, 2011
In class we discussed how counseling within the church is so special and significant and important. I believe that counseling within our families is also very important. I think that if we, in our families, counsel the same way that we do in the church, where we sit together and listen to everyone's opinions and decide together on something. I also think that in family counsels, we should begin with a prayer so that the Spirit will be with us just how it is for the Prophet and his apostles.
In class we discussed how counseling within the church is so special and significant and important. I believe that counseling within our families is also very important. I think that if we, in our families, counsel the same way that we do in the church, where we sit together and listen to everyone's opinions and decide together on something. I also think that in family counsels, we should begin with a prayer so that the Spirit will be with us just how it is for the Prophet and his apostles.
One for the Money
November 22, 2011
"Education is the best job in the world." I believe this statement. The more education, especially education about money, handling money and the effects of money, the less stressed we will be about money. Education will allow us to be able to have power over our money, not letting our money have power over us. Money is a powerful thing- "it is the symbol we use for many things." It's not in how much we make in a month, but HOW we handle that money that we do make. It is sad to know that many family problems, especially divorce, happen because of money issues and problems. May we all live within our means and take control how we manage and use our money!
"Education is the best job in the world." I believe this statement. The more education, especially education about money, handling money and the effects of money, the less stressed we will be about money. Education will allow us to be able to have power over our money, not letting our money have power over us. Money is a powerful thing- "it is the symbol we use for many things." It's not in how much we make in a month, but HOW we handle that money that we do make. It is sad to know that many family problems, especially divorce, happen because of money issues and problems. May we all live within our means and take control how we manage and use our money!
The Golden Rule
December 1, 2011
In class we discussed how we treat our children is how they will in turn treat their parents. We should treat our children the way that we would like to be treated, by them and by others. If we are to yell and be frustrated with our children, then we should expect others to treat us the same way, especially our children. We also discussed that our children will see God as they see us, their parents. This places a high demand on us parents. If our children respect us and love us and see us as loving people, they will see God as the same.
In class we discussed how we treat our children is how they will in turn treat their parents. We should treat our children the way that we would like to be treated, by them and by others. If we are to yell and be frustrated with our children, then we should expect others to treat us the same way, especially our children. We also discussed that our children will see God as they see us, their parents. This places a high demand on us parents. If our children respect us and love us and see us as loving people, they will see God as the same.
Pubic Display of Affection
December 10, 2011
In class on Friday, we talked about the cycles in life and how the empty nest is part of life. This is a time of change and a time for couples to be "together" again. The mother and father now have more time for themselves. However, we discussed how parents should be dating and spending time together even when the children are young and still at home. Parents should let their children see them be affectionate toward each other. Flirting in front of children can be a great medicine and will show the children a great example of love and marriage. I think this is very important for parents to do. My mother and father were always appropriately affectionate toward each other in front of us children, and because of that (and other things), I know that they love each other and that gave me great comfort and security.
In class on Friday, we talked about the cycles in life and how the empty nest is part of life. This is a time of change and a time for couples to be "together" again. The mother and father now have more time for themselves. However, we discussed how parents should be dating and spending time together even when the children are young and still at home. Parents should let their children see them be affectionate toward each other. Flirting in front of children can be a great medicine and will show the children a great example of love and marriage. I think this is very important for parents to do. My mother and father were always appropriately affectionate toward each other in front of us children, and because of that (and other things), I know that they love each other and that gave me great comfort and security.
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